I went to this playground to try and know myself. It was 2006 and I lived 500 yards from this school. One day, without thinking much about it, I went in and took pictures. A few months later I went again, and that was it. I didn’t plan the project, but as I made the pictures, I knew I was walking backwards in one way and seeing the future at the same time. I could feel it. More than memory. I was knowing me now by being around these childhood toys. The camera tilted because I would often tilt my head left and right when I was a kid–made things funny. But I also remember wondering how my brain made everything seem right side up even when I was looking at it upside down. That’s a good trick. The camera blurred when I remembered squinting hard enough to make everything kind of sparkle–the lights all stretched out. I wondered how my eyes could actually make a movie of the world in my head.
As a kid I used playgrounds to discover how things worked and how it felt to move my body. Kicking harder on the swing makes momentum. I had no word for it but I felt it. Spinning on the merry-go-round made me feel high. My parents called it dizzy…
When I went back and..remembered is not the right word…relived or re-felt all these experiences it somehow enhanced the meaning to who I am now. I look at things still. I wonder about how things work, and I am curious. I guess I am the same person I always was, but reconnecting with the young me helped me feel more like all of me is here now. Can you explain that?
Bend, OR 2006, Nikon D100